Can You Really Change?
by MarvelFreak98
Summary: Devan Sanders has a history with the Mercers, one in particular. Bobby Mercer was once the love of her life now she wants nothing to do with him, but he wants everything to do with her. Can she resist or will he win her back? This is my first story so be gentle I DO NOT OWN FOUR BROTHERS OR ANY CHARACTERS EXCEPT MY OCs please read and review!
1. Chapter 1: Intro

I sat towards the back of a funeral. Out of sight so no one could see me, so he couldn't see me. I loved the woman they were burying like my own mother, she was the only one who truly loved me and didn't ask for anything in return, but I couldn't face her sons not yet.

"God you're such a coward" I yelled whispered to myself so no one would look at me.

I watched as Evelyn Mercer was lowered into the cold frozen ground. I saw Jack crying, I saw Jerry with his family, I didn't see Angel anywhere, and I saw Bobby the man I'm trying to avoid. You see Mama Mercer, as I called her, had four adopted sons each with their own sad story. There is Bobby the oldest, Jerry the voice of reason, Angel the player, and Jack the baby and my best friend. I haven't seen them much except for Jerry since we both still live in Detroit. I watch his kids sometimes when he and Camille need time for themselves. I email, text, and call Jack almost every day, we always kept in touch. I remember the first time I met the Mercer brothers. I was 10, Issi was 7, Jack was 8, Jerry 11, Angel 9, and Bobby was wasn't under the best terms.

_My baby sister, Issi, and I were at the local ice rink skating with a couple friends just goofing off having fun like teenagers should. A group of guys began to enter the rink to start a pick-up game so we got ready to leave. I started to skate ahead of Issi to leave. I was right at the exit when I heard Issi cry out in pain. I turned to see a kid with blonde hair standing over her, she was holding her wrist. I didn't think about it, but I skated as fast as I could to her and rammed my body into the kid causing him to fall over. I didn't pay attention to him at all, so I bent over to pick up Issi being careful with her wrist, three more guys who were with the kid skated over to help him up, but I ignored them as well. _

"_Are you okay?" I asked Issi, looking her in the eyes, they were puffy from crying. _

"_I think I broke my wrist" she replied with a sniffle Anger flooded my veins at her statement. Our conversation was cut off by one of the boy's friends yelling. _

"_Hey, what the hell's your problem" the mystery guy yelled. I turned to look him in the face and placed Issi behind me. He was a lot taller than my 5'1 frame. He was also pretty handsome, but my anger outweighed my interest._

"_I could ask you the same question." I challenged. He skated forward closing the distance and I pushed Issi back a little out of pure instinct._

"_Who the hell do you think you are?" he asked while looking me in the eyes_

"_I think I'm the girl that knocked your friend on his ass." I said while glancing toward the blonde. I saw a look in his eye that I recognized in the mirror every day. It's a look you gain after years of abuse, I immediately felt horrible. The guy stepped forward even more causing my regret to vanish._

"_That guy isn't my friend, he's my brother and I don't take to kindly to people hurting my brother, even if you are a girl." He said while giving me a once over. I glared even harder_

"_Well I don't take too kindly to people who hurt my sister" I replied sarcastically. The guys behind him shifted and my eyes snapped to him and I think I saw him flinch and he began to talk_

"_I think this is just a big misunderstanding-" I cut him off_

" _what's there to misunderstand? Your brother ran into my sister, who got hurt, so I ran into him." The older brother who I was fighting with earlier stepped closer to me. he was only inches away from me._

"_Well if she wasn't in the way, maybe she wouldn't have gotten hurt" he said while leaning down to my height. My eyes narrowed and issi must have seen since she stepped forward ang grabbed my arm_

"_Devan, Please he's not worth it." she pleaded. I felt the anger fade from me. the boy that hit hurt skated over. I looked at him with sadness in my eyes._

"_I'm sorry for running into you, I just didn't see you." He apologized sincerely. _

" _it's alright and sorry about Devan, she can be Very over protective" issi answered with a smile. I rolled my eyes, she knew exactly why I was over protective. The boy laughed _

"_Yea she's got guts. I mean I've never seen anyone go toe to toe with Bobby before" he said. Issi giggled "Yea she's like that. I'm Issi Sanders and that's my sister Devan by the way." She replied. she motioned to me the stuck out her uninjured hand which the boy took. "Jack Mercer, and these are my brothers Jerry, Angel, and we all know Bobby." Jack replied while pointion to the guys. The guy who tried to stop the argument was Jerry, Angel had the Afro, and Bobby was the guy I yelled at. The guy all shook hands with Issi and me, except Bobby and I didn't shake hands we just nodded in each other's direction. _

"_Well now that we all met, let me check your wrist" I told Issi. I began to feel and bend her wrist. She winced a couple of times._

"_It's not broken, just sprained" I informed her. I lifted my shirt slightly to unwrap the ace bandage that supported my bruised ribs._

"_Devan no! you need it more than I do" Issi said with a worried look. I ignored her and wrapped her wrist anyways. I looked over at the guys when I was done. they all had a look on their face and I knew that they had questions._

"_Long story." I sighed. Jack met my eyes and I knew he understood, more than the others. I looked at Bobby and the look in his eyes shocked me, he just stared at my ribs and he had this angry look, his eyes met mind and he looked protective of me._

" _so do you girls want to eat at our house. Our mom loves guests and it's the least we could do." Jerry said while breaking the silence. We agreed and headed to there house._

That was the day we became part of the Mercer family. Evelyn took us in and became Mom in my eyes, even more than my biological mom, Mama Mercer always told us that she wanted a daughter and she got two. Jack and I became best friends since we understood each other better, do to our experiences. He and Issi began to date when they were 10 and 11. Bobby and I began to spend more time together and ended up dating I was 13 and he was 15. Then a lot of stuff happened and now I'm here hiding in the back at her Funeral.


	2. Chapter 2: Reunion

Bobby's voice pulled me out of my memories. I knew there was going to be a get together at Jerry's house I just hadn't decided if I wanted to go or not. I started to think about the past and all the memories that I shared with the Mercer's. I thought about how we use to joke around with each other and how we always had each other's back no matter what. I thought about the one time I stood up for Jack and how Bobby gave him shit about it ever since. I smiled and made my decision, I just had to grow a pair of ovaries to do it.

**Other POV (3****rd**** person)**

Green and his partner watched the gathering outside of Jerry's house, not everyone had arrived yet. He watched the brothers from a distance and began to spout out all he knew about them to his partner, Fowler as he looked at their files. He saw the oldest get out of his car

"That's Bobby Mercer. Heavy weight champion fuck up of the family, and that's a well defended title. Would've made his daddy proud if he ever had one. I use to know him, played hockey with him as a kid; the man got kicked out of 60 something games before the league through him out. They called him the Michigan Mauler." Green explained. Fowler flipped to the other case file.

"Who's the kid?" he questioned while reading his record.

"Oh that's Jack, he's the youngest, First class fuck up, third class rock star." Green explained

"He doesn't look like trouble." Fowler said while examining how thin his file looked compared to his older brother Bobby's.

"He's a mercer, don't let him fool you." Green warned. He watched as Jerry was talking to a group of women outside of his house. Jerry smiled and laughed, but he couldn't tell if it was real or not.

"What do we have here another model citizen." He said with a hint of sarcasm. He saw Green watching the man, Jeremiah, was what his file said.

"No Jeremiah's alright. He was a rising star in the union for a while. Man found a cause." He said with a slight chuckle. A figure past Fowler's peripheral vision, he let out a low whistle.

"Who is she?" he asked while admiring the woman's figure, Green's eyes widened in shock.

"The last person I expected to see here. Her name is Devan Sanders, Detroit's best beauty queen and ass kicker, used to be best friends with the Mercers." He said while looking at Devan, she paused for a moment looking at the house and the group of people Jerry was talking to.

"Used to be?" Fowler question still looking at the girl. Green handed him her case file.

"Yea, she and Bobby dated for a couple of years. They were the Bonnie and Clyde of Detroit back in the day, a real power couple. That was until Bobby up and left her with no explanation or goodbye. Tore her up pretty bad, not to mention what happened to her baby sister, Issi." Green said while looking at the woman with pity, she crossed the street finally, after Bobby and Jack entered the house of course.

"What happened to her?" Fowler asked. He didn't know what it was about this girl, but she had him hooked without even saying a word to him.

"They grew up in an abusive home. Devan took most of the beatings to spare her mother and sister the pain. She came home one day to find her sister dead and had to watch her mom shoot herself. She is the strongest woman I've ever had the chance to meet and know, but everyone has their limits." Green explained while watching her talk to Jerry and enters the house.

"Damn" was all that Fowler could manage. Looks like the enchanting woman had more baggage than the eye could see. He looked down at the last case file in his lap

"Where's the last brother?" Fowler said looking around the street.

"Angel? Pretty boy, ex- hustler, soldier, guess he's a no show." Green said with a sigh.

**Normal POV**

I watched Bobby, Jerry and Jack hugged and pushed each other around, I couldn't help but smile. I made my way across the street. Bobby and Jack just went in the house and Jerry took a glance in my direction. My presence made him take a double take.

"Devan! Is that you?" he questioned with a smile. I walked up the drive way toward him.

"In the flesh baby." I said with a smirk. He pulled me into a hug and spun me. I let out a laugh.

"I haven't seen you in a month. The girls have missed you." He said while putting me on the ground again.

"I've missed them. How are you?" I asked with a look of concern. He let out a sigh and shook his head.

"I miss her" he finally said while shifting his weight from foot to foot.

"Yea, we all do." I agreed. I looked down at my feet. How many more people will I lose? What did I do wrong? I asked myself. Jerry pulled me out of my pitiful inner thoughts

"Come on inside, its cold out here." He said while ushering me into the house. I laughed

"You don't have to tell me twice" I said while walking into the house. I walked out to the back to let Jerry play host to the other guests. I walked out back to see Bobby and Jack make their way to Daniela and Amelia. I hung back to listen.

"Hey there, you must be Daniela" Bobby said while shaking her hand.

"Look how big you guys are" Jack butted in. he also shook her hand and Amelia's. Bobby began to pet the dogs.

"You must be Amelia" he said to the dog. I smiled

"No I'm Amelia" the little girl shouted with a laugh

"I know" he said sweetly. They smiled back at him

"You guys probably don't remember us, but I'm your uncle Bobby and this is Cracker Jack." Bobby said. Jack gave Bobby a look

"Don't teach them that man." He said. Daniela looked at the men in front of her

"You can't be my uncles, you're white." Dani said. I shook my head at the girl. I told her about it before, but I guess it's just the way life is

"Grandma Evey is white." Amelia rationalized. I smiled at the girl

"That's right; we are a different kind of uncle. Grandma adopted me and Uncle Jack like she did your daddy." Bobby explained. I decided to walk a little closer to the group and this caught the girls' attention. They ran towards me and I swept them into a hug.

"Auntie! We've missed you." They said while I hugged them. I held the close to me and smiled

"I've missed you girls too." I replied honestly. I tickled and joked with them until I caught Bobby's eye. I stood up straight to greet them. I stopped in front of the two.

"Jackie." I said while holding out my arms. He grabbed me into a hug and lifted me off the ground. I laughed at him.

"How've you been, short stack?" he asked with a smile. I smiled back

"I've been good, you?" I asked

"Good" he said. I looked over at Bobby. To be honest I didn't want to talk to him at all.

"Devan" he said with a nod of his head. I gave him a guarded look.

"Bobby." I said with attitude oozing out of my every nerve. God! He just got under my skin. I wanted nothing to do with him. I was going to walk away, but then I heard Amelia shout

"You're a police man!" she said while pointing at Green and another detective.

"That's right and you're all under arrest, so don't anybody move" Green said while fake chasing the girls around, until Bobby caught his attention

"What about me Green? You gonna arrest me too?" Bobby asked with a look in his I that I knew too well, but I said nothing

"All depends Bobby, You keeping straight?" he asked

"Straightish" Bobby replied. Green just rolled his eyes and turned his attention to me

"What about you Ms. America" he joked. I laughed and rolled my eyes

"You can say that." I said with a coy smile. He laughed and pulled me into a hug. He and Bobby then bro hugged. Jack was next.

"Thanks for coming Green; Mom would be happy that you made it to the funeral." Bobby said.

"Shit, your mom would've been happy that you made it back for the funeral." Green said smiling.

"I didn't come back for no funeral." Bobby said with a serious tone. Green's smile fell. I rolled my eyes.

"Well boys, I loved the reunion, but I have to go." I said. The cop with Green looked me up and down.

"Leaving so soon?" he asked. I saw Bobby tense and shift towards me a little. I shifted towards Jack instead.

"Yea" was all I told him. I was going to walk away again, but he kept talking

"Well maybe I could get your number. You know just in case we have any questions." He said with a smirk. I shook my head at him.

"I don't date cops. To dangerous." I replied sarcastically. Jack and Green laughed loudly, but Bobby looked pissed, which pissed me off. I mean it's my life I'll do what I want and who I want. Jack grabbed my arm and gave me a look I understood immediately

"Please stay." He whispered so no one else could hear. I gave him a smile and agreed. The guys kept talking and the creepy cop gave me creepy looks, but I zoned out completely. It wasn't until I heard Bobby say

"Come on Green. Devan and I made a good living around here cause cops like you couldn't fine tits in a strip joint." I knew the conversation was coming to a close. We stayed at Jerry's for a while, until it got dark. Jackie and I mainly stayed together all night and after another pleading conversation I agreed to go back to the house with the brothers. I drove to the house and arrived just as soon as Bobby and Jerry pulled up. We all began to walk into the house when Jack spoke up.

"So what've you been up to Bobby?" he asked.

"I'm a freaking college professor Jack, what do you think I've been doing." Bobby replied sarcastically.

"Same old Bobby." I commented with an eye roll and smile.

"What about you Jackie? You still sucking a little cock left and right?" Bobby asked with a smile.

"Fucker" was all Jack said, but I punched Bobby in the arm.

"Knock it off" I warned him and gave him my famous glare. Bobby just shrugged it off. We all walked into the mudroom when I voice startled me

"y'all ain't right leaving me out in the cold like this" Angel said. I let out a small scream

"Dammit Angel! You scared the hell outta me!" I said with my hand over my heart. He just smiled, then Bobby walked around me and his hand brushed the small of my back. I immediately tensed, but he just acted like nothing happened.

"yo, little brother you asshole." Bobby yelled at Angel

"You ought to be ashamed" Jerry commented

"I missed my flight." Angel tried to explain

"You also missed your mother funeral you jarhead." Bobby said while pulling him into a bro hug. Jerry was next to greet him and then Jack.

"I haven't seen you in a while, bro." Angel said while pulling him into a hug. Jack smiled at him

"Did you get your teeth whitened?" Jack joked at him. His smile disappeared

"Shut up Jackie-Poo." He said. I stepped out from behind Jack and gave Angel a smile. He returned my smile.

"Hey beautiful." He said while pulling me into a hug I laughed

"Hello to you to handsome." I say. We both walked into the house after the reunion

Once we entered the house the mood changed. The air became heavy and a thick silence filled the room. I looked around and recognized everything Mama Mercer didn't change a thing. Angel finally broke the silence.

"I'm getting something to eat. Anyone want anything? He asked. I declined as well as everyone else.

"No I'm gonna get some sleep." Jack replied. Bobby stepped forward

"Jack and Devan, you can take Jackie's room. Angel take yours. I'm gonna sleep in Mom's room" Bobby said. I gave Bobby a look.

If he expects me to stay here it's gonna be a long night.


	3. Chapter 3: The unspoken hurt

I didn't argue with Bobby, since we've all had a long day. I grabbed a pair of Bobby's old sweat pants and one of Jack's hoodies to sleep in. I walked into Jack's room and lay down beside him.

"Hey short stuff" he said as I settled in. I gave him a look

"Do you always have to pull the short card?" I asked with an annoyed tone. He just laughed.

"Well it doesn't help that you are wearing clothes that are ten times too big for you." He replied with a chuckle. I looked down to see the sweats went like a foot past my actual feet, even with it rolled at the waist and the hoodie stopped a mid-thigh and went past my hands.

"Well they are comfortable and that's all that matters." I said then stuck my tongue out at him. He laughed again

"And I didn't exactly plan to spend the night." I continued. We sat quietly for a couple of minutes. Jack cleared his throat and turned to me.

"So how are you?" he asked. It may seem like a simple question to anyone else, but the look in Jack's eyes meant he was talking about Issi. I sighed and tried to swallow the tightness that formed in my throat.

"Well you think after eight years it would be easier you know? But it's not and I don't think it'll ever get easier. I just… I just don't know what I feel anymore." I replied truthfully. The tightness in my throat came back with a vengeance as well as all the painful memories. Jack shifted to wrap me in a hug which I returned.

"I miss her" he breathed. I nodded my head

"I miss her to" I agreed. Jack then picked up his guitar and began to pluck at it randomly. Bobby came in shortly and sat with his back to the bed. I know he's been crying, but I didn't say anything.

"You've been crying in here you little fairy?" Bobby asked Jack. Jack just shook his head

"Leave it alone man," Was all Jack said. Bobby just changed the subject

"You still making a lot of racket on that thing?" he asked. Jack chuckled lightly while rolling a cigarette.

"Yea still making a lot of racket" Jack replied. Bobby then turned his attention to me.

"What about you? You still sing?" he asked.

"Yea here and there, but nothing major." I answered. It felt weird talking to Bobby after all we've been through, but deep down it was nice. Bobby just nodded his head. There was a lot of tension in the room that radiated between Bobby and me and it seemed to make Jack uncomfortable, but we all ignored it.

"To weird in Mom's room?" Jack asked, breaking the thick heavy silence. Bobby just laid his head back onto the bed.

"Oh man, Way too weird. I mean everything's the same. She didn't change anything." He said. I looked around Jack's room and Bobby was right she didn't even move anything.

"It's crazy" I agreed with him. I watched as Jerry walked up the stair and stopped right outside the door. He leaned against the door jam and looked at all of us.

"Look at y'all." He said.

"What?" Bobby questioned. Jerry just shook his head

"Nothing just happy to see y'all. Happy to see my brothers and sister, that's all." He said. I couldn't help but smile as he called me his sister. They always made me feel like a part of the family.

"I'm happy to see you to Jerry." Bobby responded. Jerry took a deep breath and looked at the floor.

"I guess I'll stop by the grocery store and grab a turkey or something. Have a Thanksgiving dinner. Let's at least act like we're a real family. Mom would like that." He said. We all took in the information and I smiled at him.

"That'll be nice Jerry." I said. I glanced down the hall to see Angel step out of his room.

"Where do you think you're going?" Bobby asked.

"It's a little heavy in there. I'm gonna just go outside and get some air." Angel lied. Bobby and I started to laugh.

"You're so full of shit man. You can smell that ass from down the street, huh?" Bobby asked with a huge smile on his face.

"What are you talking about?" Angel question, he was trying to cover his ass and we all knew it, well at least Bobby and I did.

"What do you mean what? Come on you know exactly what we're talking about with La Vida Loca." I added while giggling the whole time. The look on angel's face was priceless

"Ain't nobody going to get no La Vida Loca nothing." Angel said while getting pissed at being called out. Jerry smiled.

"She's got a boyfriend." Jerry said adding to our fun.

"She got hard dick in her right now, she's screaming someone else's name, and the last thing she's doing is thinking about your black ass. Leave it alone man." Bobby said. Jackie and I were on the bed laughing. I grabbed Jack's cigarette and took a puff and handed it back. I looked at Angel and he looked real mad.

"I can't believe y'all." Angel said with a mean look. It caused us all to laugh.

"She's nothing, but trouble." I warned him. He just looked at me

"Funny, they said the same thing about you." Angel said with a sneer. I grabbed a pillow and chucked it at him and it hit him in the face and he threw it back, which I caught easily.

"Well it's the truth." Bobby pointed out. I hit him in the back of the head with the pillow and gave him a glare. He just laughed at me. Angel just turned and left. Bobby and Jerry left soon after leaving Jack and me alone.

"So do Bobby and Angel know about Issi?" Jack asked. I sighed and began to pick at my nails.

"Angel does, but Bobby and I aren't on the best of terms and I haven't talked to him in like ten years so no. He doesn't know." I said to him. He was silent for a while.

"Well are you going to tell him?" he asked. He didn't meet my eyes

"Of course I'll tell him, Issi was family and he deserves to know." I answered. He still didn't look at me.

"Are you going to talk about the things that went on between you two?" he asked I laughed at him

"Are you really that ready to bury another family member?" I joked. He gave me a sad smile

"Well you guys have to—" I cut him off before he could finish

"He hurt me Jack. He promised he'd be there and he wasn't and I can be mad at him for that. I don't have to do anything." I half yelled at him. He looked down with a hurt look on his face.

"I'm sorry Jackie, I shouldn't have lashed out at you." I apologized and hugged him and he returned the hug, but said nothing. I got up out of the bed and went down stairs to get a glass of water. I had so many emotions running through my head that I didn't notice that Bobby was in the kitchen until he spoke up.

"So how is Issi?" he asked. I was tired and didn't think about what came out of my mouth

"She's dead." I said with an angry tone. I turn to leave, but Bobby grabbed my arm and stopped me.

"What? How?" he asked with a look of concern. At that point it seemed that all the emotions that ran through my body pouring out.

"Oh so now you care?" I asked with anger basically oozing from every pore of my being. He looked shocked

"I've always cared." He said with a hint of hurt, but he covered it up with anger.

"Well you could've fooled me." I said. I turned to leave again, but Bobby stopped me

"Just tell me what happened." He said with his face inches from mine. I glared at him and ripped my arm from his grip.

"Well where do I start? Well let's start with the beatings. After you left they got worse and worse. It was two years after you left. My dad was fixing a window he broke form the last beating and had two by fours lying around outside. Issi did something to piss him off and he went at her with a two by four. I jumped in front of her like I always did and he beat me, he broke three ribs and my arm, but he kept going after Issi so I kept defending her, he beat me till I was laying on the ground and he still went after her, and I still saved her. It wasn't until I couldn't move that he finally stopped. I passed out and Issi told me that I died three times that night. About three weeks after I got out of the hospital I went home to find Issi dead on the floor with a bullet in her head. My mom walked out of the kitchen and said to me 'we were never strong enough. I'm sorry baby, but we aren't strong like you. I love you my beautiful little girl' and she shot herself in the head. When the police came I was in shock. And you know what the fucked up part is? That after two years I asked for you. I asked for you and you weren't there." I told him.

I never broke eye contact with him. Our faces were still only inches apart and he looked heartbroken. I couldn't help but feel a little happy. He will finally get a little slice of what I felt for the past ten years. Something broke inside me and I continued

"I've been strong for both of them my whole life and I just didn't know what to do. I still don't" I said with tears gathering in my eyes. Bobby pulled me into a hug and after a minute I realized what was happening and I shoved him off.

"Why!" I yelled at him with a new burst of emotions. It took him off guard and he jumped.

"Why did you leave me? I needed you and you left. Was I just another simple fuck? Was I that easy to leave?" I yelled at him. The anger was burning I my veins. He just stayed silent.

"You promised you wouldn't leave. That you wouldn't hurt me, but you did." I said quietly. I left without giving him a chance to respond. He let me leave this time without putting up a fight. I walked upstairs and into bed with Jackie and I fell into a dreamless, restless sleep.


	4. Chapter 4: Bobby

**Sorry I haven't written in a while. I've been SUPER busy with school work and show choir. I'll try and write more soon after my show choir season is over. **

**Thanks for reading, please review (It'll result in more stories *wink wink*)**

**~ MarvelFreak98**

_**Bobby's P.O.V.**_

I was shocked to see her at Jerry's house. I looked for her at the funeral, but didn't see her. Not that I'm surprised at all considering the shit I put her through. I guess I hoped that she'd forgive me, but who am I fooling if I knew anything about Devan, it was that she could hold a grudge for a long time. I watched her interact with Jerry's girls; she looked beautiful, but different somehow. She didn't have that glitter in her eye that she use to have, it had been replaced by a hard fire that bore into your very soul. I tried not to show the anger and hurt as she hugged Jackie and ignored me, but I really wasn't good at handling emotions so I let it pass. I stayed focused on her the whole day wondering if I should talk to her at all or if I should be near her at all. So instead of talking to her I compared her to the girl I use to know. She was still the sassiest women I've ever met in my life. Green interrupted my thoughts and we began talking, as usual he tried to talk me out of whatever shit I was gonna pull, but it wasn't going to work. This was about revenge for my mom and no one is going to stop me.

We talked for a while, I watched Devan leave when Green's smart mouth partner stopped to hit on her. She played it cool and blew him off, but I wanted nothing more than to put the pretty boy in his place. She was mine, but it was different now. Back in the day I'd pull her into a kiss to claim her as mine, and then beat the shit out of the guy who tried to get with her. With that thought I remembered the trouble we use to get into. I remembered how she always kissed me before a fight, said it was 'motivation', but I knew it was because she loved it when I fought for her or just in general. It always turned her on that I was possessive of her. I missed those days more than anything, but I fucked up big time. I continued to watch her the rest of the night until we got back to the house. I hoped she'd stay and she did, but I knew it was for Jackie. They'd always been close. Jackie was like her baby brother and Devan would kill for the kid. She joked around with everyone like usual; even hit me like the old days. It wasn't until Jerry and Angel left that she acted cold towards me again. I watched her walk down the stair and into the kitchen; she had a clouded look on her face so I decided to break the ice.

"So how is Issi?" I asked thinking it was a harmless question, but her answer hit me like a ton of bricks.

"She's dead" she said filled with anger, but I knew that she answered on auto pilot, because she tried to leave. I caught her arm

"What? How?" I asked with worry and sadness in my heart.

"Oh so now you care?" she asked with so much anger that it could be felt throughout the room.

"I've always cared." I replied. It hurt me to know that she thought I didn't care about her and Issi.

"Well you could've fooled me" she said with the sass she was famous for. She tried to leave, but I stopped her again and pulled her towards me.

"Just tell me what happened" I asked. I felt her tense under my grip and she pulled herself free.

"Well where do I start? Well let's start with the beatings. After you left they got worse and worse. It was two years after you left. My dad was fixing a window he broke form the last beating and had two by fours lying around outside. Issi did something to piss him off and he went at her with a two by four. I jumped in front of her like I always did and he beat me, he broke three ribs and my arm, but he kept going after Issi so I kept defending her, he beat me till I was laying on the ground and he still went after her, and I still saved her. It wasn't until I couldn't move that he finally stopped. I passed out and Issi told me that I died three times that night. About three weeks after I got out of the hospital I went home to find Issi dead on the floor with a bullet in her head. My mom walked out of the kitchen and said to me 'we were never strong enough. I'm sorry baby, but we aren't strong like you. I love you my beautiful little girl' and she shot herself in the head. When the police came I was in shock. And you know what the fucked up part is? That after two years I asked for you. I asked for you and you weren't there." She told me.

Her eyes never left mine and I didn't know how to react. Devan had been through so much shit and I hadn't been there. I say the tears gather in her eyes and she shoved me and began to yell which I'm sure Jack heard.

"Why! Why did you leave me?! I needed you and you left. Was I just another simple fuck? Was I that easy to leave?" She yelled at me. I didn't know how to answer her questions so I stayed silent. She continued her assault

"You promised you wouldn't leave. That you wouldn't hurt me, but you did." she said quietly. She left without letting me answer and I let her.

How could I have done this to her? To the woman I loved. I don't know what to do. I don't know how I'm going to fix this, but she will hear my side of the story I said to myself. I'm going to fix this and make her mine again. If this is the last thing I do then so be it, but she will be mine again.


	5. Chapter 5: Talk it out

**Heyy so Show choir season just ended so now I have a hell of a lot more free time to write and post stories. Please rate and review it inspires me to write more :].**

**~MarvelFreak98**

I woke up to arguing which isn't a surprise considering I'm in the Mercer home. I rolled over to find the spot next to me empty. Jackie must've gotten up early or I slept in super late. I rolled out of bed and got dress to head down stairs. That's when the argument got louder.

"Loco ono is not staying in this house" Bobby yelled from down stairs. I couldn't stop myself from laughing. Angel was always so predictable. The yelling continued, but I tuned it out and put make up on to be deemed acceptable by society.

I walked down the stairs ten minutes later to see Sophie on the stairs with her hands on her hips.

"Hey Sophie" I said with a sarcastic sweetness that would rot your teeth. She rolled her eyes

"Shut up Devan" she spoke, but then turned her attention back to Bobby and Angel who kept yelling at each other.

"Wow that real original! Did you come up with that by yourself?" I asked with sarcasm on full blast. Her full attention was on me, which in returned cause Bobby's and Angel's attention to turn to us.

"I don't have time for your shit Devan" Sophie said clearly annoyed. I laughed

"Really because I have all the time in the world" I told her. She said something in Spanish which I dismissed and continued to walk down the stairs. I walked past Bobby and Angel who continued to argue and sat on the arm of Jerry's chair.

"Can you stop talking to my girl like that!" Angel yelled. I sat down further back to enjoy the show.

"She wasn't your girl as of yesterday. She had another man, so I'm confused." Bobby replied which caused me to laugh earning Bobby's gaze, which was quickly retrieved by Angel

"She is my girl!" he defended. Bobby let out a loud sigh

"Whatever man let's play some fucking turkey cup man" he said clearly done with the argument. He swung the hockey stick he carried and the puck went sailing into the kitchen which caused me to yelp in surprise. I hope he didn't break anything. He turned his attention to me once again and his expression changed from annoyed to sadness, worry, then confused. I was the first to look away.

I punched Jerry playfully in the arm to gain his attention.

"Mind taking me to my apartment to pick up a few things?" I asked him. Jerry was about to reply, but to my surprise Bobby beat him to it.

"I will" he said with a look of determination on his face. I knew this wasn't gonna be good, but nothing is gonna stop Bobby once he has that look on his face.

"Okay I'll just tell Jack and then we'll head out" I said with an unsure undertone to my voice. I headed into the kitchen to find Jack prepping a thanksgiving dinner. I smiled at the sight.

"Hey Cracker Jack, Bobby and I are gonna head over to my apartment so I can get a few things." I said straight out. Jack turned his attention away from the food to face me.

"Are you gonna talk about last night?" he asked with a serious look. I let out a sigh and rubbed the back of my neck

"I honestly don't know. There has been so much shit between us that I don't know where to start." I told him honestly. He nodded his head while taking in the information. He didn't reply, but gave me a hug instead.

I walked back into the living room to see Bobby waiting on me. I grabbed my coat and headed out to his car. We were quit the whole ride there. Not talking except to give directions.

Once we got into my apartment I headed straight to my bedroom leaving Bobby alone to wander about. I grabbed a duffel bag from in my closet and began to pack some clothes and other things. I stopped to look at the pictures that lined my dresser. They were of Issi, Me, and the brothers. I stared at one of Bobby and me. It was taken at my last birthday we had together, before he left. I was sitting on his lap and we had cake smeared everywhere. I laughed at the memory and I didn't notice Bobby come in until he was standing close behind me sending involuntary shivers up my spine. He seemed to notice since he stepped even closer.

"I remember that day." He whispered in my ear causing more shivers.

"I also remember that night very clearly." He continued while placing his hands on my hips. My body leaned into him without my consent. After a second I stepped away from him without a reply because I didn't trust my voice.

I hate the fact that I was still attracted to him. I pulled myself and my hormones back together and continued to pack. I pulled a lock box out of my closet and opened it to reveal my pistols that I kept. I grabbed both guns and a couple boxes of ammo and placed them in the duffel. Once I was done I walked out of the room.

Bobby was behind me the whole time with a determined look on his face. I walked out of the apartment, locked up, and headed out to the car. I got in to the passenger side and Bobby got in shortly after.

The ride was quiet again, but full of tension. I didn't pay attention to where we were going until the car stopped and we were in an empty parking lot. I turned to Bobby with anger on my face.

"Where are we?" I asked while he put the car in park. He turned to face me.

"We need to talk." He stated. I shifted in my seat and crossed my arms over my chest as the irritation coursed through my veins.

"What?" I asked he let out a sigh.

"Don't play dumb Devan, you know what." He said he was getting annoyed. I rolled my eyes.

"Well some of us aren't playing Bobby" I retorted. Irritation flashed through his eyes. I knew he hated being called dumb as much as I hated being called out on my looks. He hit the steering wheel causing me to jump at the sudden action.

"Dammit Devan! I'm serious!" he yelled

"Well so am I Bobby!" I yelled defensively

"Why are you so fucking stubborn!" he yelled again while looking me in the eyes

"Well you have to be when you're around." I said Bobby let out a deep breath and then a humorless laugh

"You always know how to make things difficult" he replied. I shrugged

"It's a gift" I retorted

"Devan I'm sorry ~

"I don't want your fucking apology Bobby" I said angrily cutting him off.

"Just let me finish" he pleaded while looking me dead in the eyes. I let out a breathe and sat back to listen.

"I'm sorry Devan. Leaving you was the biggest mistake I've made in this fucked up life I live. I regret it every day and seeing you now just reinforces that regret, but hell my feelings toward you scared the shit outta me. When I look at you, ideas like marriage and kids come to mind and I've never thought about those things before. I never knew a guy like me could want those things, but I did and I only wanted those things with you.

And the time I got arrested before I left the cop asked if I thought I was the best thing for you and that raised a lot of questions in my mind. I just wanted you to be happy and you wouldn't have gotten that with me. I didn't know that your life would go to shit once I left and if I had known I would've come back for you." He said truthfully and with so much emotion that I was stunned. I sat back and processed the words

"Bobby I was happy with you, the happiest I've ever been in my shitty life. You made me feel safe and loved. You loved me without expecting anything in return and I've never had that. I was always the one protecting people and providing for them, but you protected and provided for me and I couldn't help, but fall in love with you, but when you left I felt used. If anyone else had done that I would've been okay, but you were the only person I let in and that destroyed me. I felt that you liked me only for what I offered just like my mom did and just like everyone else." I said to him. We never broke eye contact

"But I don't know if I can trust you again, I just don't know" I continued. Bobby shifted the car into drive and we headed home.

We didn't talk at all and once we got home Bobby laid out on the couch to watch the hockey game. I dropped my stuff off in Jack's room and headed down to check on him.

"How's the cooking going?" I asked once I stepped into the kitchen.

"Need any help?" I asked once I say him putting the turkey back in the oven.

"Nope I have it all under control, did you and Bobby talk?" he asked. I just nodded my head and leaned against the counter and explained everything to him, which he nodded here and there.

"Now I don't know where we stand" I said with an exhausted sigh. He nodded in understanding and pulled me into a much needed hug.

I walked back into the living room and sat down on the floor next to Jerry's chair. Angel sat by the record player and Bobby didn't move from his position on the couch.

Angel began to throw yellow chips at Bobby which annoyed him

"Don't start man" Bobby warned, but Angel kept throwing them

"Why do you always do that?" Bobby questioned

"Shut up" was all Angel had to say

"To be aggravating" Jerry answered for him causing Angel's attention to turn to him

Angel mocked Jerry and began to throw chips at him, hitting me in the process.

"Chill I'm watching the game" Jerry said clearly annoyed. I began to throw the chips back at Angel and Bobby followed suit. Angel threw five more at Jerry

"You a woman" Angel joked, I laughed

"Get him Jerry" I told him

"Try it one more time" he warned Angel

"What you gonna do? Big ass teeth. Bite me" Angel said while chomping his teeth causing Bobby and I to laugh. I looked up at Jerry

"You do have some big teeth Jer." I said while trying to contain my laughter. Angel began to throw chips at Jerry again and I guess he had enough since Jerry stood up and smack the back of Angel's head. I sat in Jerry's now vacant seat to avoid the fray.

"You get him Jerry!" Bobby yelled while watching the two brothers wrestle. Jerry wrestled Angel to the ground.

"The gorgeous black ladies of wrestling, Nitro and Midnight!" Bobby began to announce playfully gaining Jack's attention as he popped his head into the door way.

"Nitro got Midnight in a headlock" Bobby continued. I laughed at the fight unfolding in front of us.

"Get him Jerry!" I encouraged from my seat with a laugh.

"Midnight trying to get up, but Nitro has him" Bobby finished. The wrestling ended and we all shared a laugh. Jerry helped Angel up off the ground.

"I'm still your big brother" Jerry pointed out as he pulled Angel up. I smiled and looked at each of the brothers and realized.

This is my family. We may be crazy and loud and I love them all for different reason. Yea we fight and get into arguments, but I wouldn't have it any other way. We are all perfectly imperfect.


	6. Chapter 6: Where do we stand?

As soon as the good feelings came, they were gone. We all gathered around the table to begin our Thanksgiving Feast. The air was heavy with the new loss we all have experienced. Bobby took his position at the head of the table while Jerry and Jack sat to his right and Angel and I to his left. We said grace and began to eat.

While I ate I began to think of everything that has happened in the past week: Mama Mercer dying, Bobby coming back and all the shit that has followed. I know Jack was taking the loss the hardest. Mama Mercer gave the boy a home and a family; you can never repay that kind of debt. I should know best because she gave me the best years of my life, she was my mother in every way but blood. Mama Mercer's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Devan; you have been a great blessing to this family. You have helped my boys through so much weather you know it or not. I can't thank you enough."

Her words echoed through my head, they have helped me just the same maybe even more. The words pulled me into my memories.

_I knocked on the door of the Mercer house with Issi in tow, it was around 2 in the morning, but I needed to get us out. I heard footsteps coming down the stairs and Mama Mercer opened the door. I heard her gasp, I'm not sure what I look like, but I knew that it had to be pretty bad. She ushered us into the house and began to make us some food. She didn't ask me about what happened and I appreciated that. This wasn't the first time that I've shown up in the middle of the night all battered and bruised, but it was the first time that I brought Issi along. _

"_I'm sorry for barging in like this." I apologized with a shaky voice. My face hurt every time I made the slightest movement and I was trying so hard not to cry._

_Mama Mercer put her arms around me "It's okay child, you both are always welcomed here" I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath. Issi was shaking like a leaf on the sofa. I broke Mama Mercer's embrace and began to hug Issi while she cried._

"_Let's put her to bed and then we can talk." Mama Mercer suggested while guiding Issi to her bedroom. I took Issi's place on the couch and put my head in hands. Bobby must have heard all the commotion because he took a place right beside me. We didn't speak for a while I guess he just didn't know what to do._

"_Was it bad tonight?" he finally spoke, I sat there for unsure how to answer or if I should but I eventually nodded my head. _

"_Look at me" he requested as he gently pulled at my arm. I slowly pulled my hands away from my face and looked at him. He jumped up in a rage. "Dammit!" he screamed as he punched the wall. I flinched on instinct but he didn't catch it. he began to pace angrily around the room._

"_I'm going to kill him!" he said as he started towards the door. I shot up and placed my body between him and the doorway._

"_Don't" I pleaded as he tried to move me out of the way "you'll only make things worse". This seemed to calm him down as he placed his arms around me in a hug. _

"_You don't deserve this, Devan" he said as he continued to hug me. I didn't respond_

Bobby's voiced brought me back to the present " To hell with this, let's go get a pick up game. I want to see some quick sticks and some tight passes!" he yelled, I heard all the boys groaned and complained causing me to laugh. I got up from the table and began to gather up my plate

"No, Devan you aren't going" Bobby said as he exited the dining room. I rolled my eyes

"Like hell I'm not!" I yelled after him, tension filled the air as the argument began. He reentered the dining room "you're not" he insisted.

I set down my plate and glared at him "okay first of all you don't own me so therefore you can't tell me what to do and secondly who the hell do you think you are!" I told him as I walked past him. I looked over at Jack "Hey do you mind if I borrow some equiptment?"

"yea sure it's in the closest in my room" he replied. I thanked him as I ran up the stairs. I heard Bobby yell after me, but I ignored him. We all headed outside once everyone gathered their things.

Jerry taped me on the shoulder "you are the only person I've seen stand up to Bobby" he said as he slung his arm across my shoulders.

"Yea well he doesn't scare me" I said with a small chuckle

"I know and that scares me" Jerry admitted truthfully.

The Game was fun while it lasted and our team won obviously. The boys decided to visit Evelyn's lawyer, but I decided to stay behind since it was more of a family matter.

I headed towards a small coffee chop it meet up with my friends Nicole, Journey, and Darian since I haven't talked to them since Mama Mercer died. I reached the shop to see the three of them already at a table.

"Hey Devan, how have you been?" Nicole greeted me with a hug, followed by the other two.

"I've been good, it's just a lot to handle" I confessed we all hung our heads low, we all missed and loved her.

"how are things with the brothers?" Darian asked trying to change the subject.

"Well Jerry's good I see him on a regular bases. Things with Jack are great we've always bonded really well –"

"Oooo are you two dating?" Journey interrupted me

"Eww gross, no he is like my baby brother" I said with a laugh and mock disgust. The girls laughed as well

"Now as I was saying, I don't know where I stand with Angel since he spends all his time with his slut La Vida Loca and things with Bobby are just awkward and challenging" I finished with a sigh.

"how are things awkward?" Nicole asked

"Well he is just so freaking stubborn and sarcastic and protective that it pisses me off" I explained.

"Sounds like someone we know" Darian and Journey said at the same time causing all of us to laugh, after the laughter died down Nicole motioned for me to continue.

"well as you guys know I'm still super pissed off at Bobby, so after the funeral I was planning on ignoring Bobby until he asked me about Issi", this earned a chorus of winces and frowns, "so I went off on him, all the emotions that I've had bottled up came rushing out all at once. And this morning he drove me to get some things from my apartment since I'm going to stay with the boys for a while and he drove me to a random ass parking lot and just tells me the reason he left was because he didn't think he was good enough for me and that his feelings for me scared him and to top it all off he said that if he had known about Issi he would've come back" I continued with a heavy sigh

"Well what did you say?" Darian asked, I looked around the table to see all the girls leaning in just a little to find out the end of my story

"I told him that he made me feel used and that I couldn't trust him" I said truthfully. Journey had a look of annoyance and anger

"well you shouldn't trust him. That man is an ass, he left you with no reason and he didn't even tell you goodbye" she told me, I nodded my head. She was right in every way, but it's hard because after all we've been through together he was the only person that I trusted completely

We continued to make small talk for a while, until my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey Devan, we are all finished here" Jack informed me

"Okay cool, can you guys pick me up?" I asked while taking a drink from my cup

"Yea where are you?" jack replied. I told him the name of the coffee shop then hung up

"So when do we get to meet the Mercer's?" Nicole asked. I let out a laugh

"Soon, I can only take so much stupid before I get overwhelmed" I said with a wink. The girls let out a laugh and exited the coffee shop. I finished my coffee and then got a text from Jack saying that they'd be her in 10 minutes.

I made my way outside to wait when a car pulled up in front of me and an unwanted visitor stepped out of the driver side

"What do you want?" I asked the creepy officer from the funeral. He stepped towards me with his hands up in a surrender position

"I just want to talk and maybe take a beautiful woman out to dinner" he said with a smirk as he made his way around the car to stand in front of me

"Well tell me when you find one stupid enough to accept." I sneered. I looked up and down the street hopping the brothers would be here soon

"Oo that hurt" he placed a hand over his heart "you don't even know my name sweetheart" he said and stuck out his for me to shake

"Nor do I want to" I replied ignoring his hand, the guy just didn't know when to quit

"The name is Fowler" he tried again

"Good for you" I snapped, come on where are the brothers when you need them?

"And you are Devan Sanders" he said while putting his hands in his pockets, this caught my attention. Panic started to rise as I looked up and down the street again

"Who are you looking for Devan?" he asked with a smirk and fake curiosity

"Nobody that concerns you" I snapped again, I guess he saw the panic in my eyes because he stepped closer and invaded my personal space

"Don't worry Devan, I'll protect you" he said while gazing down at me. I couldn't help but notice the huge height difference he stood about a foot taller than me at 6'1 maybe.

By the grace of God, Bobby pulls in and parks behind Fowler's car, he got out quickly and pulled me to his side

"You alright Devan?" he asked, but his eyes never left Fowler, Jack got out and guided me to the car. Bobby took this opportunity to charge at Fowler, but I pulled away from Jack and placed my body between Bobby and Fowler. By the look in bobby's eyes he was ready to kill.

I placed my hand on his chest "Calm down, Bobby" I said to his softly, his heart was racing and his breath rapid. His eyes never left Fowler until I grabbed his face and forced him to look at me

"I'm fine, nothing happened and nothing will happen" I reassured him, his eyes softened and he turned to Fowler

"You better be lucky she saved your ass pretty boy, but you ever come near her again and I'll knock your teeth in" he threatened, but his eyes never left me

"The girl can make her own choices" Fowler said, Man this guy is stupid!

"Well I choose for you to leave me the fuck alone" I sassed while pulling Bobby towards the car. Jack looked at me as Bobby got into the driver's seat

"I've never seen anyone calm Bobby down like that, even Ma couldn't do it" he confessed I gave him a small smile

"Just think of me as Bobby's tamer" I said with a wink, he laughed

"No kidding", Jack hopped into the back, while I sat in the passanger's seat.

A little while into the drive Bobby placed his hand on my thigh like he use to when we were dating. It use to be his claim. Under normal circumstances I would have protested and told him to fuck off, but the look on his face was possessive and primal and to be honest it turned me on.

We got stopped off at the place that Jerry wanted us to meet him at, I guess we were a little early since Jerry and Angel weren't here. Bobby still hadn't calmed down all the way so I turned to look at Jack in the back seat.

"Hey do you mind giving us a minute?" I asked and motioned to Bobby, he nodded his head and exited the car. I turned my body to face Bobby.

"Hey" I said trying to get his attention, but he didn't turn "Hey look at me" I tried again, but he still didn't turn so I took his face in between my hands and made him look at me

"Look at me Bobby. I'm alright he didn't hurt me" I said softly while running my fingers through his hair like I use to do. He grabbed my hand that held his face and turned his head to kiss my palm, he didn't say a word, but I knew him well enough to know he was calm. I pulled my hand out of his grasp and exited the car.

What the hell just happened between us?! Where do we stand now?!


End file.
